Wow. There aren't a lot of people that I know that I don't like. Hmm. There are people that I do need to let go though. I think the most important person that I need to let go is who I was...aka the "old" Karyn.
Let me explain.
The person that i am now is not the person I was eight to ten years ago. That version of me was a loud, obnoxious, violent and I hate to say this--a drunk. I was not a good person, and I hurt and physically assaulted a lot of people. The good thing about that version of me is that I never held back anything. It is extremely liberating to say exactly what you want to whenever you want to. However, it is also often hurtful, spiteful, and insulting. I also loved feeling like an individual. I did what I wanted and unleashed the full power of my personality...which was exhilarating. There are so many other aspect of who I used to be, but I won't go into it.
I am only learning now (aka in the last 5 years) that I can still be me without the stupidity. I can still be fun and spunky while being respectful and nice. AND, giving up drinking was one of the best things I've ever done. DON'T DO IT!!! IT'S NOT WORTH IT!!!!
I need to fully let her go before I can move on with life. It's taking some time, but it's happening! :)
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I go back to the SG today. I have to say that I am a little sad about it. This weekend has been AWESOME, and I alway miss my family when I leave. A LOT. Oh well. A hui hou. Until we meet again.
Lyrics.
by: Justin Young
Chant (Oli)
Eia Hawai'i (Behold Hawai'i)
He motu (An island)
He kanaka (A man)
He kanaka Hawai'i e (A Hawaiian man)
'Anno'ai me ke aloha nui e Hawai'i (Greetings with great love Hawai'i)
Aloha no e ku'u one hanau e, (Love indeed to Hawai’i the sands of my birth)
Aloha e, aloha e, aloha e (Love...)
On my own, on the wind
A moment ends and one begins
Sense of freedom over the sea
But I watch my home get further from me
Sometimes I reach to meet the clouds
But I always keep on foot on the ground
My horizons widening
But nights are cold here, sometimes lonely
Eyes are open, so much to see
But sometimes they long for familiarity
And away on distant lands
I always keep one foot on the sand
'Anno'ai me ke aloha nui e Hawai'i (Greetings with great love Hawai'i)
Aloha no e ku'u one hanau e, (Love indeed to Hawai’i the sands of my birth)
Holidays bring me home
My appreciation has grown
Warmer waters, smaller pond
But some thing here circle on
Sometimes I reach to meet the clouds
But I always on the ground
And away on distant lands
I always keep one foot on the sand
2 comments:
Kudos to you for saying it out loud! And in public. *clapping* :) You go gurrl!
lol. Out of the weeds, but still in the forest. ;)
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