Hello all. :)
I know that it has been a while. Sorry about that. I've been having a couple emotional weeks (as you will soon read...assuming you just don't stop after the first part...), and I haven't really wanted to share a lot. However, After talking about things, I figured that it's best to share what I'm going through. That way, things are still real. So--here it goes. :)
First of all, I found this website: www.lifed.com/bucket-list-225-things-to-do-before-you-die/. It is AMAZING. I listed a few things I have done…and a few I want to do. I think I'm doing pretty well!
Want
2, 13, 14, 15, 23, 37, 38, 42, 46, 48, 52, 54, 55, 56, 60, 62, 63, 67, 72, 73, 75, 77, 83, 88, 89, 90, 95, 98, 106, 107, 108, 109, 113, 116, 118, 121, 123, 125, 131, 138, 145, 149, 154, 157, 158, 159, 160, 161, 173, 174, 178, 182, 184, 185, 186, 187, 201, 211, 212, 216, 217
Have
6, 9, 11, 12, 27, 29, 36, 43, 44, 45, 85, 87, 93, 94, 95, 100, 103, 104, 120, 124, 126, 128, 129, 140, 150, 154, 164, 175, 176, 191, 195, 200, 202, 204, 206, 207, 209, 218, 220, 223, 225
Here is a blog I wrote last week, an have been holding on to. I'd like to hear what you think. :)
I've been thinking a lot about relationships and love and…you know. All that mushy stuff.
I watched a movie, and ended up talking my friends about chick flicks. One of my friends said that I should watch more chick flicks, and I told them that I didn't like watching chick flicks because it portrays a skewed view of what love is.
Seriously. Chick flicks are terrible. I hate watching the girl ALWAYS getting the guy of her dreams. I hate seeing the fairytales. That never happens. You know what happens in real life??? LIFE. Things just doesn't happen that way…
But, can I tell you a secret?
I am a romantic. The conflict comes through my life experiences. I thought I had the fairytale. I thought I had happiness…and in ended up being fake. It wasn't real. He didn't really love me…
So I made a choice then that I only wanted real love.
The question is…what is real love? I don't think I even know. Is it sad that I want a guy to step up and show me what real love is? That I want someone to help me learn to trust and love again? Is it too late for me to find love? Do I really only get that one chance, and it''s over?
It makes me feel so weak to not be able to heal this heartache on my own, but I have to wonder-- Is it even possible alone?
Is it too much to ask for the guy of my dreams to just come scoop me up? Everyone around me gets the fairytale..or their version of it. What about me? I feel like the girl that just doesn't get it. Am I deluded to think that i deserve love?
Maybe that is the point. Why would I be entitled to love? What makes me better than the people around me?
One of my favorite talks is by a guy named Brad Wilcox--called "To Be Like A Child." In the talk, he tells a story about his 6th grade teacher coming into the classroom and slamming down his books in front of the class. Then he says, "Self-pity is the worst disease."
Sorry for the pity party. I guess I just have a lot on my mind.
Thanks for reading my ramblings. I promise, things will get better. :) The quirky crazy Karyn is in here somewhere, I just need to find where she ran off to. ;)
Anyway. Here are the lyrics for today...and a link to the video. :)
Both Of Us
by: B.o.B feat. Taylor Swift
[Chorus: Taylor Swift]
I wish I was strong enough to lift not one but both of us
Some day I will be strong enough to lift not one but both of us
[B.o.B:]
Ever thought about losing it
When your money's all gone and you lose your whip
You might lose your grip when the landlord tell ya that you're due for rent
And the grass so green on the other side
Make a nigga wanna run straight through the fence
Open up the fridge bout twenty times
But still can't find no food in it
That's foolishness
And sometimes I wonder, why we care so much about the way we look,
And the way we talk and the way we act and the clothes we bought, how much that cost?
Does it even really matter?
Cause if life is an uphill battle
We all tryna climb with the same ol' ladder
In the same boat, with the same ol' paddle
Why so shallow? I'm just asking
What's the pattern for the madness
Everybody ain't a number one draft pick
Most of us ain't Hollywood actors
But if it's all for one, and one for all
Then maybe one day, we all can ball
Do it one time for the underdogs
Sincerely yours, from one of y'all
[Chorus: Taylor Swift]
I wish I was strong enough to lift not one but both of us
Some day I will be strong enough to lift not one but both of us
[B.o.B:]
I can feel your pain, I can feel your struggle
You just wanna live, but everything so low
That you could drown in a puddle
That's why I gotta hold us up, yeah hold us up
For all the times no one's ever spoke for us
To every single time that they play this song
You can say that that's what Bobby Ray wrote for us
When the tides get too high
And the sea up underneath get so deep
And you feel like you're just another person
Getting lost in the crowd, way up high in the nosebleeds
Uh, because we won't be near yet, both of us
But we still stand tall with our shoulders up
And even though we always against the odds
These are the things that've molded us
And if life hadn't chosen us
Sometimes I wonder where I would've wound up
Cause if it was up to me, I'd make a new blueprint
Than build it from the ground up, hey
But if it's all for one, and one for all
Then maybe one day, we all can ball
Do it one time for the underdogs
From Bobby Ray, to all of y'all
[Chorus: Taylor Swift]
I wish I was strong enough to lift not one but both of us
Some day I will be strong enough to lift not one but both of us
I know that it has been a while. Sorry about that. I've been having a couple emotional weeks (as you will soon read...assuming you just don't stop after the first part...), and I haven't really wanted to share a lot. However, After talking about things, I figured that it's best to share what I'm going through. That way, things are still real. So--here it goes. :)
First of all, I found this website: www.lifed.com/bucket-list-225-things-to-do-before-you-die/. It is AMAZING. I listed a few things I have done…and a few I want to do. I think I'm doing pretty well!
Want
2, 13, 14, 15, 23, 37, 38, 42, 46, 48, 52, 54, 55, 56, 60, 62, 63, 67, 72, 73, 75, 77, 83, 88, 89, 90, 95, 98, 106, 107, 108, 109, 113, 116, 118, 121, 123, 125, 131, 138, 145, 149, 154, 157, 158, 159, 160, 161, 173, 174, 178, 182, 184, 185, 186, 187, 201, 211, 212, 216, 217
Have
6, 9, 11, 12, 27, 29, 36, 43, 44, 45, 85, 87, 93, 94, 95, 100, 103, 104, 120, 124, 126, 128, 129, 140, 150, 154, 164, 175, 176, 191, 195, 200, 202, 204, 206, 207, 209, 218, 220, 223, 225
Here is a blog I wrote last week, an have been holding on to. I'd like to hear what you think. :)
I've been thinking a lot about relationships and love and…you know. All that mushy stuff.
I watched a movie, and ended up talking my friends about chick flicks. One of my friends said that I should watch more chick flicks, and I told them that I didn't like watching chick flicks because it portrays a skewed view of what love is.
Seriously. Chick flicks are terrible. I hate watching the girl ALWAYS getting the guy of her dreams. I hate seeing the fairytales. That never happens. You know what happens in real life??? LIFE. Things just doesn't happen that way…
But, can I tell you a secret?
I am a romantic. The conflict comes through my life experiences. I thought I had the fairytale. I thought I had happiness…and in ended up being fake. It wasn't real. He didn't really love me…
So I made a choice then that I only wanted real love.
The question is…what is real love? I don't think I even know. Is it sad that I want a guy to step up and show me what real love is? That I want someone to help me learn to trust and love again? Is it too late for me to find love? Do I really only get that one chance, and it''s over?
It makes me feel so weak to not be able to heal this heartache on my own, but I have to wonder-- Is it even possible alone?
Is it too much to ask for the guy of my dreams to just come scoop me up? Everyone around me gets the fairytale..or their version of it. What about me? I feel like the girl that just doesn't get it. Am I deluded to think that i deserve love?
Maybe that is the point. Why would I be entitled to love? What makes me better than the people around me?
One of my favorite talks is by a guy named Brad Wilcox--called "To Be Like A Child." In the talk, he tells a story about his 6th grade teacher coming into the classroom and slamming down his books in front of the class. Then he says, "Self-pity is the worst disease."
Sorry for the pity party. I guess I just have a lot on my mind.
Thanks for reading my ramblings. I promise, things will get better. :) The quirky crazy Karyn is in here somewhere, I just need to find where she ran off to. ;)
Anyway. Here are the lyrics for today...and a link to the video. :)
Both Of Us
by: B.o.B feat. Taylor Swift
[Chorus: Taylor Swift]
I wish I was strong enough to lift not one but both of us
Some day I will be strong enough to lift not one but both of us
[B.o.B:]
Ever thought about losing it
When your money's all gone and you lose your whip
You might lose your grip when the landlord tell ya that you're due for rent
And the grass so green on the other side
Make a nigga wanna run straight through the fence
Open up the fridge bout twenty times
But still can't find no food in it
That's foolishness
And sometimes I wonder, why we care so much about the way we look,
And the way we talk and the way we act and the clothes we bought, how much that cost?
Does it even really matter?
Cause if life is an uphill battle
We all tryna climb with the same ol' ladder
In the same boat, with the same ol' paddle
Why so shallow? I'm just asking
What's the pattern for the madness
Everybody ain't a number one draft pick
Most of us ain't Hollywood actors
But if it's all for one, and one for all
Then maybe one day, we all can ball
Do it one time for the underdogs
Sincerely yours, from one of y'all
[Chorus: Taylor Swift]
I wish I was strong enough to lift not one but both of us
Some day I will be strong enough to lift not one but both of us
[B.o.B:]
I can feel your pain, I can feel your struggle
You just wanna live, but everything so low
That you could drown in a puddle
That's why I gotta hold us up, yeah hold us up
For all the times no one's ever spoke for us
To every single time that they play this song
You can say that that's what Bobby Ray wrote for us
When the tides get too high
And the sea up underneath get so deep
And you feel like you're just another person
Getting lost in the crowd, way up high in the nosebleeds
Uh, because we won't be near yet, both of us
But we still stand tall with our shoulders up
And even though we always against the odds
These are the things that've molded us
And if life hadn't chosen us
Sometimes I wonder where I would've wound up
Cause if it was up to me, I'd make a new blueprint
Than build it from the ground up, hey
But if it's all for one, and one for all
Then maybe one day, we all can ball
Do it one time for the underdogs
From Bobby Ray, to all of y'all
[Chorus: Taylor Swift]
I wish I was strong enough to lift not one but both of us
Some day I will be strong enough to lift not one but both of us
3 comments:
I'm glad you posted it. It's good for you to get it out. As for the chick flicks... Don't worry. I'll get that mentality out of you. Mwahahaa! ;)
LOL! I think we need to get a bigger movie shelf. ;) Tell me when you want to commence the countdown. :)
I love reading your posts but I miss hanging out with you! Come back to Hawaii and visit! I need to check out that bucket list and start making my own! Take care!
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